You know, being on CALL for the ONE who KNOWS it ALL is the MOST love❤️ beautiful, and DIFFUCULT JOB. I am so honored, to HAVE it. BUT, I remember EVERY day, that IT, TAKES love❤️ JESUS…IN FULL. That, if I start making, LIFE about ME…Well, YOU SEE. THINGS, GET MESSY…FAST. It GOES from JOYFUL to DRAINING, FAST.  Did you notice, that the word, difficult, got spelled different? That was not accidental. It requires, YOU being PUT in, the WORD! BOTH, the WORD difficult, and the LIFE word…and LIFE WORD. In Proverbs, there is a VERSE, that kept playing, on MY HEART today. It is found in the ADDRESS of 19:21. I find that fascinating, because 19 is FAITH, and 21…OVERCOMING SIN. I remember one version I read saying…”Many are the ways, of a man’s heart. But, the Lord delivers Him , from them ALL. “You SEE our HEART can LEAD us ASTRAY. Especially, WHEN it has been hurt. 💔



Something else, the LIFE BOOK, our LOVE story from HOME, says, is that the HEART is “deceitful, above ALL things.” Now, I believe HERE, it is referring to a HEART that, has not been surrendered. ONE thing, I will NEVER 4 get…it was so HARD. Our butterfly angel😇 came, with a message. It was a few months, after her final flight. In it, she said, ” IT IS CRITICAL TO STAY SURRENDERED.” Now this message came from the Heavenly Father. Beautiful as the messenger WAS, IS and ALWAYS will be. The message, NOT EASY. STILL THIS DAY. IT TAKES JESUS…TO DO THIS. AND NOT IN 1 AREA. EVERY single AREA and TERRITORY, MUST STAY this WAY.



So, let’s GET specific…BECAUSE THAT is REQUIRED 2 DAY….














Because the KING CARES…..




He is clear, THAT He will GIVE us the DESIRES of our HEARTS. However, HE does NOT say, that THINGS will NOT FALL apart… or APPEAR to FALL apart…BEFORE WE RECEIVE them? Has THIS EVER happened to you? STOP. In the NAME of LOVE. By NOW. I am certain…HIS LOVE , has drawn oUT some tEARS from YOU…because it Does that… 🙂 It is the Healing Power…




The song on the Radio 🙂 “Christ in ME” 🙂 YES – EVERY HOUR we NEED HIM 🙂



He does not say, THIS world will not startle us. But, being startled, is NOT the same thing, as being moved. In fact, ONE definition I found for IT was to surprise. Oh, HOW often JESUS reminds me, that He felt FEAR, but never CHOSE FEAR. Grace GRACE… He says to ME. I was walking…and it was dark, and the flashlight was on, and something popped up, and it startled me, a bit. And, I jumped a bit. But, i was unharmed, because He guarded me.



It is NOT our JOB to worry about the DARk. It is our JOB to LOVE. And HE will LIFE and lift that LOVE up, above the HAZE of the WORLD. AND those who WANT it, will GRAB onto IT for, DEAR LIFE!!! And, THOSE who Don’T, well JESUS will handle them. Years ago, a band named TEARS 4 FEARS came out. A song they had. “Sowing SEEDS of LOVE.” Yes, THAT is the point. JUST LOVE!



And, AS you do THIS…in ALL you ARE and BECOME..OH the JOY, YOU will HAVE. I will GIVE you an EXAMPLE. Recently, WE had something come up, my husband and I..and it could have been a wrench. It was something, we suspected a while back. AND, when this dropped, in our laps, WE did NOT exactly HAVE a support TEAM in place. But, WE HAVE and HAD then, the GRACE of GOD. AND AMIDST the HAZE of the BAD STUFF…and there was A LOT, just to BE REAL…HIS LOVE FLOATED UP.



I am REMINDED of a MOVIE NOW. Of COURSE, being the movie GAL, I am. 😉






ONE MORE DAY..ONE MORE TIME…ONE MORE SUNSET..I’d BE SATisFIED…BUT THEN again..I know WHAT it WOULD do…It’d Leave be wishing still..for one more day..with YOU… {FEELING MY SARAh’s} )


In Hope Float’s the main CHARACTER goes HOME because she has…to FACE the PAIN of her PAST.  break💔 And the relationship, she has with her MOM, well I related so much to that. And, the scene where her mom, goes (dies) HOME…That, is ALWAYS so tough, for ME to watch. Even the one, before. I can recite, it by HEARt. love love❤️ She is speaking to her grandaughter, and says, “My cup runneth over.” Later the grandaughter says it too. But, at the end, the MAN, she ends up with, is BEST. He, reminds me of my DAVID. And…JESUS in HIM. ❤️


I LOVE the end, BECAUSE…it speaks about HOPE. Love❤️ And I remember LEAVING, thinking YES. MY hope is in ONE thing, and ONLY one thing. 🙂 JESUS. ❤️

But, as a child…that seemed easier…didn’t it?

I got older, and I got hurt, and Life happened, and naturally it seemed… that HOPE got put in OTHER stuff. It was so subtle, I don’t think I noticed it…at first….

But LOOKING back…it SEEMS so PAINFULLY obvious…. TEARS….

My husband always says to ME, “Wisdom Is the opposite, of the Obvious.” ❤️

The PAINFUL truth is…IF things were Elea Grace’s WAY, somedays, I would crawl under the covers, and NEVER come out. Sad 🙁 But it is… Because… JESUS is with ME… BUT, HE does NOT LET me. ANd, HE is MY strength. ANd it is NOT My WAY. It is HIS way. And, HIS WAY is BEST. ❤️



In 2011, I was in prayer, with my then prayer partner. I will never forget, what happened. It still ROCKS me, 2 the core. Though at the time, I did not really understand. The Heavenly Father spoke to me. ❤️  He apologized to me. He said, “I want to apologize to you. For the suffering you have had to endure, and will HAVE to endure. But just know, that IF there, were ANY other WAY, we WOULD have TAKEN it, TOGETHER.” At the time, I looked around, at my life, and everything seemed okay. But, little did I know…what WAS to come….



I do NOT for one single second, believe THAT word, was JUST for ME. Because, GOD is NO respector of PERSONS. And, the LOVE that HE has for ONE of US, HE has for us ALL. One THING, HE has REALLY broken ME of, IS my DESIRE to FIX things. When I want to NOW, or I am even remotely tempted to try to RUN things, I step back, and hand the reigns over. I am so GRATEFUL for LOVE, GRACE and MERCY. The love love❤️ ❤️ ❤️ MOST BEAUTIFUL 3 CHORD STRAND. Definitely not easily BROKEN. JUST watch GOD. You might think THINGS look ODD. Crazy. These DAYS. But, OH…HOW HIS LOVE will RISE UP….❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️


I looked up the definition of HAZE…and found that it is…STATE of mental confusion… TO JESUS that is JUST an ILLUSION. REST in HIS LOVE. WATCH HIS LOVE>>>BREAK EVERY SINGLE barrier down, and deliver YOU from the E- GYPT you MUST LEAVE. YOUR PROMISED LAND AWAITS!

In His Grace,

Elea Grace




13 Aug 2018

Butterflies Within & Without ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

10551057_10153035975977785_1329849181222001721_n10906241_603447309799087_6353916573394658360_nResizeImageHandler230309_10150298782717785_970542_n1004097_672578022798647_818834619973558876_nThis morning, beginning THIS at 7:39, yes so significant. Completion, and OVERCOMING disease. That means 2 things. It refers to, WHAT the world considers “SICKNESS” and, also DISCOMFORT. So many people tell me, that they would like to have, what I have. Particularly, with JESUS. I need to be REAL, and admit, that MY discussing this, is SO NOT comfortable. But, He said, it Needs to be broached. Because, the TRUTH is, ANYONE can HAVE a LOVING relationship, with JESUS. Love❤️ And, the ONLY reason, HE GIVES ME, what HE does, is simple. I ALLOW HIM, into EVERY single PART of my LIFE. ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

From the FIRST MOMENT, I took a BREATH, I chose JESUS. Love❤️ But, as a baby things happened, around me, that brought certain amounts of chaos and confusion. Sad🙁 And, THOSE circumstances COULD have changed my destiny. BUT JESUS, never left ME. Love❤️ He kept FIGHTING for ME. He clearly states, HE will go after EVERY LOST sheep. And HE WENT after ME, with PASSION. Love❤️

In 2009, when my Sarah Angel Butterfly, was in the hospital, a BOOK came out. IT is MY STORY. Our story as Family… Till then.  WOW. I TEAR UP, as I WRITE THIS. Because the SONG…”It’s YOUR LOVE” Yes, THAT is ABSOLUTELY IT. ❤️

I MADE it OFFICIAL to CHOOSE JESUS, when I was 9 years OLD. ❤️  Someone told me, that Joyce Myers did that too. I said, well JESUS LOVE, it draws YOU in. ❤️ I later found out, that NINE means DIVINE PERFECTION of the HEAVENLY FATHER.  Love❤️  I was at FCA camp. I will NEVER 4 GET that day…. EVERYTHING about it, is WRITTEN on MY HEART.

MY husband and I went on our HONEYMOON, nearby, and I took him there, and I showed him around. BECAUSE, it is SUCH as IMPORTANT place 2 ME, and JESUS. Love❤️ So many times, there were plans, by others to take me AWAY…but JESUS said NO!!! Gives ME BUTTERFLIES. 😇Love ❤️

HE LOVES ME when I AM within, and well without. He has sat with me, when I have been laughing with glee and laughter. And, when I have been weeping tears of BLOOD. He has cried over me, while I took a razor, and sliced at my wrist, because I felt I desever it.  I was often convinced, I deserved the BAD. Oh, how that made, MY JESUS sad.

And, I say this, to SHINE the light on HIS LOVE and RESCUE. What was so strange, was the AVENUE, the road then…that led me to the choice of harm. I watched a “Christain” Program on TV.  Someone called me a Jesus Freak, the other day. I said, you can call me what you like. I LOVE to LOVE. I will tell you some of the STORY, if you like. He rescues ME EVERY day.  The man, later pulled the car over. Saying… Wow.

Side note: I know there are some seeming typos, but I am leaving them in, as instructed…❤️ ❤️ ❤️


People do NOT Always like what WE bring to the table. It is often, a lot to digest. But, THOSE that do…how beautiful. What a GIFT! Gives us BUTTERFLIES!!! Like the first time, your child was born 🙂 Or, the first day of school!!! Joy, that cannot be described 🙂 It is INSIDE and OUTSIDE! !!

So, IF you want the BUTTERFLIES of HEAVEN. It is QUITE simple REALLY. He says, WE cannot LIVE by BREAD ALONE. So, ALLOW JESUS to CLEAR and CLEAN the LEAVEN. ~~~


Within the GOOD and the BEAUTIFUL… JUST as it SHOULD BE…

and WITHOUT the BAD…. IT is NOT in HIM. SO, it is NOT in US! BECAUSE HE LIVES in US! You See?

He does not CARRY that….

The Greatest of these is HIS LOVE ~~~~

I will put a link, to the story, the BOOK…He had me write in 2009. It official came out 2010. Under my middle name.


Love you ALL. 🙂 He has WON…remember that 🙂 For those, chooseing HIS ways, THAT is FACT.

In His Grace,

Elea Grace




11 Aug 2018

❤️ Groundhog Day In Reverse ❤️

19693_491506860886978_1220456359_n10534117_10153035712682785_3149373111854498049_ndefault-ds-photo-getty-article-69-96-136169256_XSHope-sees-the-invisibleoriginalEver since the 12th of July.  My life has been like the movie, Groundhog Day.  Have you seen that film?  The main character lives the same day over and over again.  But bad things happen.  And, in my life. Yeah.  It is Not like 💗 that. I am so thrilled to SAY!!!  In fact, it is exactly opposite of That!

On that day, something wonderful happened to ME!!!!!! From the moment, I opened my eyes… I got surprised after surprise!!! Miracles BEGAN a new.  And, well, they have NOT stopped.  That day I was told, about a supplement, and my husband went and purchased it.  Before it, even hit my BODY.. .a PArTY began inside OF ME!  I kid you NOT… It was so strange… Suddenly things began to rearrange…

There was this NEW JOY… And I know it WILL never EVER stop.  It will NEVER run DRY… No matter how much I cry.  It is this GIFT.  Placed within and on my Head, as WELL.  Oh… Yes… He has made me whole. COMPLETELY WHOLE!!!!!   It is ALL over my Face.  The GRACE!! !!  ❤️ ❤️ ❤️  It was like every day was a DRESS 👗 rehearsal for THAT ONE day…  when I woke UP!  FREE!!! Knowing that Full 🌝 Victory had been ACHIEVED !

Even today, there is A NEW SONG, and GOD bless the many broken, mangled, shattered, tattered, roads…. That I have walked ON with JESUS never letting ME GO.  The many times, I have made Him cry, the times… He has sat by my side, till I got over myself and repented, and asked for help.  Oh, how He has heard my Yelp… Counted my tears.  Calmed my Fears…  He has my babes. Keeps them safe.  Because they are His most.

Even on my weakest Days… “I get a little bit stronger… ” to quote a country artist… Sara Evans ( gotta Love ❤️  our Sara’s)  God Bless them ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ #heavenspeaksthroughmusic

In life, We are supposed to Love.  It us the number #1 commandment.  Love one another.  Today, the prayer is, that anything in the way, of that love, be healed.  So, that the Love can be FREE.  ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

We are Living proof, that HIS LOVE heals, it IS REAL, and it WORKS.  No one said, it is ALWAYS easy.  But, the promise is, that it is WORTH it.  Love ❤️

Faith, Hope, and Love… But the Greatest of these… Is Love ❤️

In His Grace,

Elea Grace

06 Aug 2018

It’s IN MY BLOOD ~~~

03273ddc140fa4e38892b46ba3282636images12189871_730291773768079_329414883154103138_n12166887_10207993635856946_547456957_n11250155_10153643998796223_3692579556315771082_n12239719_10153428949738579_1494682980063883186_n778863_10151673469177785_890606283_oSo, This morning, like most mornings, I wake up with my best friend. And, Surprise…My Love gift is NOT right beside me. Let, me xplain. He was on the couch. Jesus has need of He.  My sweet David, is healing quite deeply. That is beautiful, but as a wife, and well sister in Jesus; hard to see. It is like a mirror, and a TV show. And, OH, the places WE go, with JESUS. Just now, as I tuned IN to write. I sought what channel of music, to listen to. And THIS song, played on the station. I tear up, as I type. It is called the “Cowboy in ME” The lyric that I can remember most, is “The urge to run, the restlessness… the heart of stone, I sometimes get. ” Let’s just stop there, for a minute. Because, THAT causes me to weep. The whole song…JUST WOW. I just sat before Heaven, and said yes. Thank you, for the Grace, to FEEL.  And now, the song…Happy MAN. As Jesus reminds me, what a treasure, I AM. We are.  ❤️

When my husband, and I got married, I remember saying this…”You are just, a cowboy. It will take Jesus to tame you.” I had no idea, what I meant. But, I knew deep down, I AM a cowgirl at heart, with JESUS. I know, that HIS plan, is someday, for us, to have a farm. And, that this place, will be healing, for many to come to. This is NOT my plan. So, I am not worried. I used to FEAR, it would not be. But, now I know, THAT is not ME. THAT is NOT in my BLOOD. I AM a KID of FAITH! Not just simple FAITH. But, FAITH that to other people, well just does NOT seem to make sense. And, I am so okay with THAT. Because, IT is NOT MY FAITH. It belongs to JESUS! It is NOT in my BLOOD to choose ANYTHING but LOVE! There is an artist out, who has a song, called, “It is In my BLOOD” And, when I heard the song, I heard it backwards. I had to laugh…because, I know that was GOD. Later, I heard it again, and the kid, who sings it, told the story. And, I thought, wow.  I remember, going through ALL that, as a KID. And, JESUS rescued me. Rescue him, JESUS. Show him, who he is, and how precious he is. One day, I believe, Jesus will make a way, to tell that kid, how much, that song, helped me. 🙂 🙂 🙂

This is such a TIME of GREAT healing, where JESUS is doing SUCH, a mighty work. BUT, I need to be VERY REAL, and tell you that IT often, just HURTS. There is a REASON, for songs, called the HURT and the Healer. They were written, at the throne of Heaven. It simply is not possible to heal, without pain. It just HAS to happen. In our gym, it says, no pain no gain. But, WE know, DEEP down, that our pain, IS HIS GAIN. And that BOTH the statement NO PAIN NO gain, and HIS pain is our gain, are true, 🙂 And, that is totally, okay. 🙂 Thank GOD for Grace! I say that, EVERY single DAY….Grace to breathe, to digest, to receive HIS BEST. To forgive, to LIVE. to EXIST. To Sing. To HOPE in HIS LOVE. To RECEIVE. TO HEAL. Oh, the GRACE….Written on HIS FACE. In Anguish. In JOY.

The Grace to swim in the DEEP and the SHALLOW ENDS. The Grace to be PATIENT, and KIND. AND, to let JESUS fast FORWARD or REWIND. Yes, LATHER, rince…repeat. There is always reason…for HIS purpose, and HIS rhymes.  And often we think we have mispelled, or done wrong. But, Jesus stands, ringing the liberty bell…and passing out, new HEART songs! He is clear, what is on this earth, will NOT stay. But, it still belongs to HIM. SO, the goal, must be to LOVE. To thank HIM for His plans not being undone.

There are SO many THINGS that are popping up…and some well, they at first can, feel like a wrench in the plan. BUT, when surrendered before, our KING. Wow, now the song…FLAWLESS…YES, JESUS WE HEAR YOU! Oh, how GREAT HIS LOVE! YOU ARE so MUCH more than USELESS! Just breathe. Let HIM LOVE you…Cry when you need to. He is catching every single tear. He will show you, everything you need to know. Breathe again. Release. Catch the wind. Smile. In the healing, pool of Bethesda. Yes, Lather, Rinse, Repeat.  In our BLOOD is, the BLOOD of Heaven. Not, an ounce of LEAVEn. But, that does not mean, WE will never suffer. Because, HE suffers with us. Crucified, once, no way. Love struck, by the lightning. Too many times too count. But, thank God for Grace. Thank GOD for HIS LOVE. Oh, this state. This Freedom from that captive place. Chosen and called. Counting it ALL joy yet? 😉

No Regrets will stay here….NO FEAR will survive…JESUS will THRIVE….IT’s IN MY BLOOD…THE LOVE…..THE LOVE THE LOVE THE LOVE THE LOVE….. ❤️

“Even if it gets us convicted, WE will be on our knees, with our hands, LIFTED!” YES… Soken WELL sweet Heaven given, NEWSBOYS!!! Bring that GOOD NEWS!!!!  HEAVEN will NOT be silent! There is such BEAUTY being BIRTHED #heavenspeaks ❤️


Elea Grace




03 Aug 2018

Young and Settled N Jesus

184414_10151642914512863_1045860989_n29caf0651dd94f57758d9befcb449fc819693_491506860886978_1220456359_njesus_095Hi! As always, I never really never know, what way He is going to go with each entry. It is SO fun, THIS LIFE adventure, with JESUS!!!! But, make no mistake, not one day passes, that I think, wow that was like really easy. I have had moments, of reflection, even as of late, where I definitely, marvelled at HIS LOVE, and GRACE, That is for SURE. Every day, He makes me….well ME!!!! I could, not BE without HE. You know, how in the LIFE book, it says, He will renew our youth? WELL, I am LIVING PROOF! People, look at me, and say, you cannot be your age. And, I say, I take my JESUS vitamins. Smiling. Everyday.

Today, the 31st, WE, His offspring CELEBRATE HERE, the jump into a new month. Great things are coming, beautiful ones, but don’t misunderstand. These things come with challenges surrounding them. The good news, iS this…HE has already WON! Yes, we can rejoice in THIS! Just yesterday, a storm came, and oh, did HE show up!!!! He said, ” No way! Not, over my rainbow KID! I LOVE HER! She has victory! He rerouted my path! It is settled, by my LOVE! She will not be broken down. No tears, I cannot hold. No fears, I cannot calm.” By Grace, I am continually FREED, and I am Loved out of every captivity. Oh, did that storm calm fast. I sat in AWE. Yes , my KING again, set my heart at EASE. He holds my heartbeat. He is my music.

In the midst, of this day, oh so much had transpired. There was JOY. My Jesus Omnipotent Jeshua. Oh, He gives me such GLEE. So much more than Happy. He also, knows how the concources  of my grief go. because, every day, He decides, from A-Z. I say, sometimes aloud, “Which one are we on today?” Sometimes, I just can’t speak. But, HE always reaches for me. HE is my EVERYTHING. Recently, I went back to my place of birth. Not easy, and well, contains a lot of hurt. But, He promised JOY, in the process. Let me tell you, HE sure did deliver. WE got refreshed, and found healing in the waters. It was lovely to see, many we just adore. And, we are just lovestruck, and how pieces are falling into places.

I cannot tell you, how many times, a day, I am lovingly reminded, “You cannot mess this up.” The first time, was when my sweet , Sarah Butterfly angel was born. That day, I will NEVER forget. You know, how people say, women forget giving birth. Well, I cannot. It is written on my heart. It is so deeply gifted to me. Maybe why He only gave me one, officially. But, when she took her final flight, He told me something more. He said, “No one else can mess this up either. Not even the enemy.” Do you guys hear me. THIS is victory!!!! Jesus said, the ENEMY is defeated. This is in the LIFE book, HIS word. It stsates, He is a defeated foe. GIVE him NO ROOM. Jesus DESERVES YOUR LOVE, and for YOU to RECEIVE HIS!

Lastly, as a child, I watched a show. I have referenced it b4, it is called “The Young and Restless.” Now, whether you like the show, or not. In my childhood, it was a special thing. I watched it with 3 very special people. My mom, my dad, and my Uncle. And JESUS, used THIS show, as a platform, for ME to LOVE on them. And, by association, them to me. I am almost in tears, as I write this. I was not exactly, a completely “normal” kid. And, everyone was always trying to make me that way. Here come the tears. Yet, Jesus accepted. Me. NOW, I am Heavenly proud, and standing in the Grace of GOD alone. Filled with HIS LOVE, Mercy and HOPE. He says YES, to ME every day, and I say YES too! It is a GREAT thing. 🙂 I have had times in my life, I have not watched this show, times when I did. But, what I do know, is JESUS as taught me so much. I often pray for the actors, and families. These stories, come from somewhere. Often great pain. I have observed parallels in my own life. Yet, by HIS Grace, He kept strife, from our home. Oh HIS LOVE. So beautiful. MILK and HONEY. So sweet. So much more to come.

In the last 3 weeks, I have gone from bed to not just walking but, swimming too, and jogging. MIRACLES abound. I can EAT again!!!! Could not EAT FOODS for over a year. BUT, HIS LOVE HEALS!!! MUCH MORE TO COME!!!! HIS LOVE IS REAL!!!!! His LOVE Settles ALL accounts.


31 Jul 2018

In His Steps and Hers

12004852_925494327532118_784396942730903230_n19693_491506860886978_1220456359_nhappily-ever-after-wood-print1393995_10201078220131542_2001900371_nIt has been A LONG time since writing, was on the “AGENDA.” Part of me wants to start this post, with “I’M BACK.” Trust me, It is NOT like, I went on a vacation. But, I was definitely put on a PAUSE. You see, when your JOB, is to just BE and DO whatever Heaven commands of YOU. It’s quite simple. You either Do it, or You Don’t. As a child, WE are supposed to learn this lesson. And I am very grateful, because I was given excellent earthly parents. They did everything, humanly possible, to TEACH me. They, particularly my biological mom, Sarah Cooper, was committed to taking me, and my siblings to church. I never know, where Jesus is going to take things, in my life or words. I just kind of buckle in, and say, “Let’s go!”

My Mother, and I had a very interesting relationship. In a LOT of ways it was a Love/hate relationship. But looking back, I can safely say, Jesus is what rooted it in LOVE. She was the first person who introduced me, to Jesus. I will always be eternally grateful to her, for that. But, because my mother, had a LOT and I mean a LOT of undealt with pain, and I was a mirror, of that pain, I was not always an easy part of her life. I would watch her, and marvel at her. She was literally a teacher. I’m certain, in the Heaven’s Jesus still uses her, in that capacity. I believe, she and I were more alike, than I knew, but she was scared to speak of it. In that time, it wasn’t something that was done. Even today, so many who knew her, tell me, how proud, she is, or would be of me. How much I remind me of her. I used to be hurt, because I harbored my own pain. I dealt with so much trauma, and even abuse. But, Jesus is a HEALER, and the Holy Spirit a nurturer. Not to mention, our Heavenly Father, is a strong protector, and this beautiful union, just this amazing FAMILY, the greatest GIFT, to be a part of. AND, my greatest desire, is for the family I was birthed from, to be united with the one, I was birthed into. In my heart, I know, ONE DAY, it will BE. Because JESUS doesn’t LIE. He promised ME.

My Mom and Dad, though they had their own pain, and challenges, taught me, and I pray us, deep down to take things one day at a time. Jesus lead our home. ALL be it, it was often silently, and it took years to see what Jesus was doing behind the scenes. If you asked others, in our family if this was true, I’m not certain they’d agree. And that’s okay with me. Because, it’s where THEY are. And, here’s the thing…. Someday, EVERYONE will see. The LIFE BOOK is Heaven’s word. It’s known, as the word of God. And, when it is in YOU, you LIVE in a different way. You have more FREEDOM. You MOVE different. YOU speak DIFFERENT. YOU BREATHE DIFFERENT. YOU MAY SMELL DIFFERENTLY, TYPE DIFFERENTLY< see? 🙂


THE POINT is….. HEAVEN has a plan, and surrender of our plan is critical TO that plan being SCENE…..

I walk in the steps, of Sarah…my littlest Angel. Oh they are tiny shoes, and big shoes. Tiny wings, and MIGHTY wings. I also, walk in the steps of my mother Sarah as well. Now, my Father, and so many more. I am so grateful, for the heavenly cloud of witnesses. I will NEVER forget the day on October 18, 2015. It was nighttime. I know it was late. I rememeber that we had been up all night. and i think, it was around 3:33 AM. My heart literally stopped from the pain. BUT GOD……

I went HOME. Yes, I SAW the witnesses. I was so VERY enveloped by the LOVE of HEAVEN. When I get to the darkest places, I now, have that memory, and JESUS does not allow, it to torment me. It ALWAYS comforts ME. IT ALWAYS brings HEALING. It is truly BEAUTIFUL!!! The very first thing that happened, is Sarah comes running up to ME…. She said, “Mom, what are YOU doing HERE?” Then, in the same breath, “Nevermind, that doesn’t matter come on!” She grabbed me, and took me through!!!! It was BREATHTAKING! I was in wonder, as everywhere I looked, was more pristine, and phenominal, and I just had no words, because, I was HOME. I was SAFE. I was FREE. I was where I ALWAYS DREAMED to BE, WANTED to BE. Where I COULD BE ME. WHERE I FIT!!! OH IT WAS JUST PERFECT!!!!!! I went into a room that was like a GRAND BALL ROOM. AND EVERYONE JUST SHOWERED ME WITH LOVE! SOMETHING THAT HAS ABSOLUTEY NEVER, EVER HAPPENED HERE ON EARTH. NOT ONCE,in full, that I recall..

The closest I EVER came, was when I was 16, some friends, threw a surprise party for me, and I got some hugs, and presents. And i remember thinking, if my life were done tonight, that’d be okay. And that seemed like a strange thought to have. But remember, as I share b4, I used to, as a teen have other issues with bad stuff, like self harm. But Jesus healed me. Thank Heaven’s The testimony of His love. It has now been 16 year, since any of that bad. Jesus is so GOOD!!!! I believe that IS Gone for good, and HE is used me, to help so many others, with that, thank God.

But back to Heaven…..  Jesus is Electric. He was struck by lightening on the cross. And he held a sphere with electricity in it, representing my life. After what felt like time, thought time exist not there, He came over to me, and said something. He said, “Well, I need your answer.” I said, “what is the question?’ “Do you want to stay?” I thought about it for a moment. Then I said, “This is so hard. Because, this is MY HOME. I have ALWAYS wanted to BE HERE. You KNOW THAT. But BEFORE you sent me THERE, I MADE a promise to YOU. I told YOU, that I would ALWAYS stay there for as LONG as YOU NEEDED me to, NO MATTER what. AND well, I just don’t think and feel that the work is finished there. He smiled, and He looked at me and said, ” My beautiful, my friend, My daughter, My precious, My Love, My everything Oh, how I want to thank you. For most don’t even think about it. They don’t count the cost. Now, to be fair, since that moment, I have had MANY moment, where I have said, “Um, if you’d given me a glimpse I would have said no.” But the truth is, I never would have said NO to Jesus. And, even my thinking I would, is kind of like a running joke. He is the Lion of Judah. My Lion KING. That movie took on NEW meaning for me. BOY, did it ever. There is more to what happened to me that day, but I don’t feel led to share ALL of it.  And, I will end with this, The SONG BUTTERFLY is coming on. OH I LOVE MY JESUS!!!! # HEAVENSCaLLINGCARDS

14 Jul 2018

My Wall

Today, was glancing at a film, that was on Hallmark. And you will recall, if you have ever watched, a fil on this chanel, that it is ALL about Love.  It was shown to me, that LOVE is at it’s VERY core about acceptance. IF WE do NOT accept in FULL, the LOVE and everything that goes with it, WE reject in FULL, not part, JESUS. Now, to be clear, this is the LOVE of Heaven. THAT is NOT about religion, striving, or even surviving. It IS about one thing, and ONE thing ONLY. Jesus.

When you are rejecting Jesus, you choose every prison imaginable. BUT WHEN YOU accept HIM, you are FREE. NOTHING can bind YOU, when you say YES to, the unadultarated, LOVE of HEAVEN.

15 Jun 2017

Heavenly Fugue

This weekend, I watched a show called “Saving Hope.” It is the last season, and I kind of stumbled upon it one day. The episode this week, was called ” Doctor Robot.” There’s a few things significant, about it, to me. Most doctors, who train to be doctors, are about precision, control, and logic. It’s how their books are written. In the aforementioned episode, this man, who had lost a child, suddenly became funny. One of the doctors, had a gut feeling, that it might not just be a “normal” development.

This doctor, on the show, reminds me of my husband. Because, he has this ability to see so deeply, and yet is often afraid of the affects, of speaking about it. In the show, the man was informed, there was in fact something, wrong, and he needed immediate surgery, or he would die. At first, he said no. He was afraid, that the surgery would take away the “joy.” But the truth is, when it’s real, and not just an avoidance tactic, or something else; nothing can take away joy. He eventually complied, and the doctor helped him to see the truth.

Personally, I have made a commitment to God. That no matter what, even if I have no words, my heart will praise HIM. That everything I have, am given, and desire, is HIS alone. I don’t know how long, my days on earth will be. It’s hard for me to SEE that God has used me, to make a difference. Because, quite frankly, that vision is blurred. In complete truth, I just want the pain to end, the healing and mending to be finished. I want to be able to LIVE as intended. I don’t know for certain how, where or when that will Be. But, without a doubt, Jesus has never let me down. Not ever. Despite, how it seems or feels. His will, and way must happen, and what it takes to get there, is just tough to watch at times.



I’m so confused
I know I heard you loud and clear
So, I followed through
Somehow I ended up here
I don’t wanna think
I may never understand
That my broken heart is a part of your plan
When I try to pray
All I’ve got is hurt and these four words

Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done

I know you’re good
But this don’t feel good right now
And I know you think
Of things I could never think about
It’s hard to count it all joy
Distracted by the noise
Just trying to make sense
Of all your promises
Sometimes I gotta stop
Remember that you’re God
And I am not

Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will

I know you see me
I know you hear me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Goodness you have in store
I know you hear me
I know you see me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Good news you have in store

So, thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
I know you see me
I know you hear me, Lord

  • 3 When Judas, who had betrayed him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and the elders. 4 “I have sinned,” he said, “for I have betrayed innocent blood.” “What is that to us?” they replied. “That’s your responsibility.”
  • Matthew 6:14-15

    14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
  • 25 And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”
  • 12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.
  • 15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.
  • 3 I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse; and all peoples on earth will be blessed through you.”
  • 23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,

In His Imminent Grace,



05 Jun 2017

My Wonderland…Heaven

Fact. I live IN this world, but I’m NOT of this world. More often than not sometimes, I keep my mouth shut. Not because I’m afraid, but, more because, I’m learning, to speak, when HE moves me. I woke today at 4, on the 4h, of the month of Grace. Yes, and I didn’t wake, feeling happy happy joy joy, yet I did. I woke, and took my ear plugs out, and heard he birds singing. I heard a phone ring. And I thought, Jesus is calling. “Oh come to the altar, the Father’s arms, are open wide. Redemption, and freedom, the precious blood of Jesus Christ.”

Only Jesus Himself, understands everything. When vile things, attempt to bring Chaos, He is the ONLY one, who can step in, and set things aright. If WE try to fix people, we miss the point. Without LOVe, “we are a clanging symbol.” His LOVE is Mercy, and HE is LOVE. I don’t know, how long, it will take or be, here. And at the very center, I am okay with that. In the beginning of the journey, I would pray to go home. But, now, I know Jesus IS my home. And despite, how it feels, that there is purpose, in ALL things.

I hope someday, that people begin to see, that death is not what it is portrayed to be, by most. This world, is full of so much hurt. But, Jesus’s world, is the freedom, to be able to SEE clearly. When God says, NO, then it means NO. And, there are times, where that is happening, and many are ignoring His guidance. Some, are trying to convince themselves, and others, that they are doing what God wants. But, only He truly knows.

Jesus is not a God of guilt and condemnation. He is a God of Love and adoration. I woke up, and so much, in so many ways, have wanted to go back to sleep again. I think, THIS must have been, how HE felt, and sometimes, she felt. Because, for those of you, who do read this, you know our youngest little angel, is now with Jesus. I suppose, in some ways, she was, and yet never WAS. Love is about acceptance. It is about Jesus, tearing down road blocks.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8Amplified Bible (AMP)

Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening].

Love never fails [it never fades nor ends]. But as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for the gift of special knowledge, it will pass away.

04 May 2017

Bathing in the FIRE

Somedays, can’t even recall the date, or day. And thank GOD, it does not matter. The things that mattered before, both do and just DON’T, in the same way. I LOVE baths. Do you??? They have always been a time of reflection, healing, and REST, in my life. As a kid, they were also a place of GREAT JOY!!!!!

Now, I can’t handle them, in the same way. I cannot stay for HOURS in the water, because, I am at times, painfully just aware of the effect, on my physical body. And, there was a time, I would have thought, I had failed. But, NOW I understand, THAT being “sick” as this world calls it, is okay. Let me be clear, I am not saying I believe that Bad, has taken roots. But, I finally recognize, that being different, is not a terrible thing. AND, that suffering is NOT, nor will ever be a life sentence prison, in the way it WAS before.

Because, now LOVE is what leads me. I think it always was, in a sense. BUT, it was clouded by pain. AND how, HIS Love just remains everywhere is mind boggling. THAT I get to participate, is as well. I have gone through seasons of great trial, torment and at times, it feels and has felt, like just torture. BUT, the one thing that remains is LOVE. His name, Jesus.

I thought this entry was going to be about a film, I just saw. And it IS, in a way. 😉 On the 11th, I saw the movie, “The Shack.” I will likely be referring to this film, a great deal. I began to read the book years ago, but I never finished it, all the way through. The movie, was and IS such a gift from Heaven.

It will take a few entrys to complete what has been shared, about this amazing piece of just Heaven given LOVE. But, let’s start with THIS part. “Religion is to much work. I don’t want slaves, I want friends.” That is a quote from the film. It truly touched ME to the core.

I encourage YOU, to take a moment, and see it. Very worth your time. Will write more soon. 🙂

13 Mar 2017

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