You Want To Hold the Intangible

novedad_78Hope-sees-the-invisibleFor weeks, I have been seeking wisdom from the Lord on this post. I knew when it was given, that it would probably be one of the MOST gutwrenching entries, I have ever been used to write. When I was a child, all I remember is my parents trying to appease me. My brothers saw me get lots of attention, and a lot of stuff. To them, it looked like I had a perfect life. To them, and to many others, there was nothing to complain about.

But, the TRUTH is, my life was not what I saw as perfect. Don’t get me wrong, because I had a roof over my head, parents who loved me, and most basic needs provided for. But, I did NOT really know LOVE. It is still a daily struggle, to receive LOVE, even though it should be something that just comes natural. It just NEVER has to me, except with children. I can LOVE any child on the planet. In fact, I can connect with children, and animals, better than most adults. I guess, because they can SEE God in me. They LOVE HIM, and it seems most others either want to use HIM, or reject HIM on the spot. SO few just receive. I did not know how. Everywhere I looked seemed to be the wrong direction. I lived a very isolated life. Even when I was with others, I was never really present.

I remember my mother would hug me, and I would pull away. It wasn’t that she did NOT care. IT was that when she hugged me, I did not just feel LOVE. I felt so much more than that. I pulled away, because I could not handle the pain. Sometimes being around others, can be so intense for me, that I have to take days away, just to recuperate. No one understood then, and few do now. It is not an easy existence, because most days, I feel I just do NOT belong here. I wonder why God still has me here? Only He knows for sure.

But, perhaps, it is to help me appreciate the gift of the intangible. Maybe God will connect me with others whose testimony is like a treasure hunt. Those who suffered in silence, for whatever reason, and need  voice or platform, are crying out. The LOST need to be found. Time is running out, and it is time to LOVE anyway. It is time to forgive often, and choose HIS way, everyday. Sometimes people will agree, and others they will agree to disagree. But, nonetheless, it is NOT time to speak ill of others. On the contrary, it is indeed time to speak LIFE. It is time to speak HEAVEN to come.

According to definition, to be intangible means, unable to touch.

It seems my whole life has been ONE of a search for the tangible. In fact, don’t most of us do this? Don’t we admire those who tangibly have a strong testimony? Isn’t it the obvious that usually gets acknowledged? I mean, when something is the best or lasts the longest, that can be intangible and tangible. I suppose it depends on perception.  As a child I wanted friends. I saw them as tangible representations of love. Everywhere I looked around me seemed to be full of loss. I never fit. Very round whole, into very square peg. It just did not work.

It was like I was LOST and I could NOT be found. Yet, somehow in the midst of ALL the darkness around me, that often looked like light, He found me. As a child I remember vividly everyone telling me, “It is NOT about YOU.” I mean, this was drilled into my head. It was like a broken record that would NEVER ever stop playing. Occasionally, I would hear, “The world does NOT revolve around YOU.” They were right, but what they did not mention, or perhaps did not know was significant. It is about HOW MUCH God LOVES ME! It IS about HOW MUCH GOD LOVES ALL OF US!!!

As a child I was very affected by justification. I would justify everything. I would do it for fear that NO ONE would see the tangible in me. Because I could NOT see it.  A lot of times I justified my own sins, and indiscretions. I, of course, had to eventually repent before God, and ask forgiveness. People who don’t really know me, or us, often think I’m just a religious crazy person. That used to bother me. But, it does not as much as before. Because in scripture it says, that NOT everyone will understand.  It specifies that we should not expect them to get it, until they GET HIS LOVE.

So many people have a package waiting outside their hearts door. It is filled with LOVE, and the wonders of Heaven. But, because it is NOT TANGIBLE, to us it often goes unopened. The tangible things, like hugs and kisses, and kind words, and music, people, and movies, are so much easier to connect to. Or are they? We are designed to LOVE God. Yet, we get distracted by the world. WE are designed to be LOVED by GOD, yet we want to dictate how it looks or feels.

We want to HOLD the intangible….don’t we, don’t YOU???

When I was a teenager, I was attracted to Christian music. I mean, I loved ALL kinds of music. But, as a kid, there was something about people singing about God. It was tangible to me, though intangible to many. Anyway, there was a Christian folk singer I liked. Her name, Susan Ashton, and I remember buying a tape years ago. You know, back when those were a dime a dozen. 😉 There was a song she sang about this topic.


Hold The Intangible Lyrics

You’ve heard the stories
You’ve read the message in the pages
You consider crucifixion: is it fact or fiction for the ages
Did He really appear
Like they say that He did
Does it conquer the fear
Did He die so that we could live
You’d like to think that it’s true Oh, But you want to hold the intangible
To fashion the darkness into familiar shape
To see with your eyes
To know in your mind
Oh ye of so little faith
Only the heart, can hold the intangible
There is a chamber
In the soul of the believer
It holds reason in defiance
The demanding hand of science may not enter
But let’s just suppose how it would be
To trade all you know
For one ounce of true belief
Then you’d learn the peace of that placeOh, But you want to hold the intangible
To fashion the darkness into familiar shape
To see with your eyes
To know in your mind
Oh ye of so little faith
Only the heart, can hold the intangibleBut let’s just suppose how it would be
To trade all you know
For one ounce of true belief
Then you’d learn the peace of that place

Oh, But you want to hold the intangible
To fashion the darkness into familiar shape
To see with your eyes
To know in your mind
Oh ye of so little faith
Only the heart, can hold the intangible

You want to hold the intangible

Oh, you want to hold the intangible.

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Only RECENTLY did I realize that I was holding the desire to have something tangible, as an idol of my heart. When you have had it, even for a little while, it is easy to miss when it is gone. I laid down the desire for things I can touch, and I do every single day lay down that desire. Do, I miss what was? Oh, so much sometimes it is tough to breathe. But, am I thankful for the GIFT to be able to LOVE tangibly? YES. I am thankful for my husband, our children, animals, friends, family members, and so much more.


Ecclesiastes 2 Amplified Bible (AMP)

I said in my mind, Come now, I will prove you with mirth and test you with pleasure; so have a good time [enjoy pleasure]. But this also was vanity (emptiness, falsity, and futility)!

I said of laughter, It is mad, and of pleasure, What does it accomplish?

I searched in my mind how to cheer my body with wine—yet at the same time having my mind hold its course and guide me with [human] wisdom—and how to lay hold of folly, till I might see what was good for the sons of men to do under heaven all the days of their lives.

I made great works; I built myself houses, I planted vineyards.

I made for myself gardens and orchards and I planted in them all kinds of fruit trees.

I made for myself pools of water from which to water the forest and make the trees bud.

I bought menservants and maidservants and had servants born in my house. Also I had great possessions of herds and flocks, more than any who had been before me in Jerusalem.

I also gathered for myself silver and gold and the treasure of kings and of the provinces. I got for myself men singers and women singers, and the delights of the sons of men—[a]concubines very many.

So I became great and increased more than all who were before me in Jerusalem. Also my wisdom remained with me and stood by me.

10 And whatever my eyes desired I kept not from them; I withheld not my heart from any pleasure, for my heart rejoiced in all my labor, and this was my portion and reward for all my toil.

11 Then I looked on all that my hands had done and the labor I had spent in doing it, and behold, all was vanity and a striving after the wind and a feeding on it, and there was no profit under the sun.

12 So I turned to consider [human] wisdom and madness and folly; for what can the man do who succeeds the king? Nothing but what has been done already.

13 Then I saw that even [human] wisdom [that brings sorrow] is better than [the pleasures of] folly as far as light is better than darkness.

14 The wise man’s eyes are in his head, but the fool walks in darkness; and yet I perceived that [in the end] one event happens to them both.

15 Then said I in my heart, As it happens to the fool, so it will happen even to me. And of what use is it then for me to be more wise? Then I said in my heart, This also is vanity (emptiness, vainglory, and futility)!

16 For of the wise man, the same as of the fool, there is no permanent remembrance, since in the days to come all will be long forgotten. And how does the wise man die? Even as the fool!

17 So I hated life, because what is done under the sun was grievous to me; for all is vanity and a striving after the wind and a feeding on it.

18 And I hated all my labor in which I had toiled under the sun, seeing that I must leave it to the man who will succeed me.

19 And who knows whether he will be a wise man or a fool? Yet he will have dominion over all my labor in which I have toiled and in which I have shown myself wise under the sun. This is also vanity (emptiness, falsity, and futility)!

20 So I turned around and gave my heart up to despair over all the labor of my efforts under the sun.

21 For here is a man whose labor is with wisdom and knowledge and skill; yet to a man who has not toiled for it he must leave it all as his portion. This also is vanity (emptiness, falsity, and futility) and a great evil!

22 For what has a man left from all his labor and from the striving and vexation of his heart in which he has toiled under the sun?

23 For all his days are but pain and sorrow, and his work is a vexation and grief; his mind takes no rest even at night. This is also vanity (emptiness, falsity, and futility)!

24 There is nothing better for a man than that he should eat and drink and make himself enjoy good in his labor. Even this, I have seen, is from the hand of God.

25 For who can eat or who can have enjoyment any more than I can—[b]apart from Him?

26 For to the person who pleases Him God gives wisdom and knowledge and joy; but to the sinner He gives the work of gathering and heaping up, that he may give to one who pleases God. This also is vanity and a striving after the wind and a feeding on it.

After a LONG hard look at ME, I have realized that I am not a huge fan of the tangible. The place that God has met me is intangible to most. But, yet I am learning that even when I want to hold the intangible, that it is still NOT about me, and it IS about how He LOVES. I pray every day, that He will LOVE through me not only in a intangible way, but someday a tangible one too.

Was thinking of the Velveteen Rabbit. I know there is an entry somewhere about it, on here. But, what I will say, is that LOVE made the rabbit become REAL. The LOVE of Jesus, and the Heavenly Father, as well as the HOLY Spirit, is intangible, at first. But, the more we receive it, the more TANGIBLE it becomes.

I invite you today to say YES to the intangible. Say Yes to the one who made you and LOVES you more than words can express. His Glory will shine, with or without us, but we were created to participate in Heaven’s arrival. Somewhere inside, the seed that He planted is still present. As LONG as your heart beats you still have choice. Choose HIS LOVE today.

In His Grace and Glory,

E and Fam


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