Oxygen Please???

Posted: 16. 06. 2014 | Author: Ellie Sharpe | Category: Inspirational

What is your oxygen? It seems like an easy question. I mean, most would just say, air. But, really take a moment and think. What are you breathing in? In our case, we are breathing in very deep pain. Not on purpose, and really not by our own doing. Yet, GOD is the anchor in our lives, and thankfully more often than not, we breathe in HIM and His love. He is there in the midst of the storms.

A part of us wants to scream, throw things, run away. In some respect, WE have done ALL of those things. But, yesterday it was reveled that we cannot run away from the storm, or just get over it. WE must in fact go through, to be made NEW. So today, I am receiving the gift to mourn. It sounds so strange to say that, or even type it. Because I never ever would have considered that a blessing. Yet, God’s word says it is.

This is not an easy topic for me. I did not wake up going, “YAY, I get to talk about how much THIS hurts.” But, God impressed upon me, that not only is it critical for my healing and ours, David and I together, it will help others. For I was reminded that He wastes no suffering. Have you ever considered suffering, in GOD could be a blessing? The enemy will put suffering on us, but remember even He has to seek God to do so.

A dear sister of mine was used to share some wisdom. She said, “God qualifies us. He said, consider my servant Job. He says the same about us. You are not only being considered for the job, you have been chosen.” It really changed my perspective. Not to say that it is easy, and there is no struggle. Because, that my friends would be a lie. But, what I can share is, it is definitely made easier, by leaning on GOD.

I ask forgiveness, if I indirectly put off the mourning process. I repent for getting defensive when people would tell me, it’s ok. They would say it’s ok to grieve. BUt, what they really meant, was not in relation to the spirit of grief, it was about mourning.

JOY comes in the mourning. Do you know how long we have cried out for JOY??? Because it has been a LONG time. For me personally it has been decades. I would cry so hard, my nose bled. In fact, over 36 times, in the last 2 years, I have wept that hard. So, when people say “You’re not grieving. I think huh???” In my head I’m going, “I have had the Garden of Gethsemane experience, many times.”

The hardest part about everything that has happened, is the pulling away GOD has done. There have been people, who could not handle His GLORY, who have run away, or tried to hitch a ride, and were adequately and swiftly removed by God. It would be so easy to get bitter, or overcome by sadness and nothingness. To just be saturated by the world, and discouraged on every single turn, would really be a piece of cake. But, David and I can’t do that.

It would be for one, so disrespectful to GOD. For two it really wouldn’t serve a purpose. Because it would just create more HELL in the process. Meaning, it would multiply death instead of life over to others. If we chose to ignore the healing that God is so graciously offering, we’d surely die, and quickly. Don’t you think that is the enemy’s plan?

I have friends and even some family who have confessed secrets to me. I go before God and ask HIM, “Why are they not coming to you with this?” I don’t mind people confiding in me. I repent daily, and rebuke gossip or anything not of God rearing it’s ugly head. I’m grateful that God is teaching me to be more quiet in spirit and even more teachable. But, having said that, “I am not God. I cannot fix the problem.” I can be loving, and a listening ear and often am, but right now it is hard to do so. I ask for patience please, as does David.

This is a time and season where GOD has stripped us pretty RAW. We asked to be made real, raw and relational. we asked HIM to make us bulletproof. What a process. Dear LORD in Heaven….only HE fully knows. SO many LOVE us, but don’t get it. which is totally ok. Because, ALL that really matter is, “God does.”

I pray these entries are healing for someone. I was thinking about a movie recently. A woman wrote a blog and no one responded. I wonder, “Is God using us to help others?” Yet, in asking this I didn’t realize that it was a prideful statement. I so repent of that. It seems ok, simple even. But, it was clouding my healing process. The healing that HE so graciously has gifted.

Lord, forgive us for any time we have directly or indirectly tried to do your job. YOU alone are GOD. You created us for a purpose, to LOVE and worship you, and to be used to share that holy LOVE. We reject the lies of the enemy this day. We lay down anything, be it emotion, thought, action, or something else, that might be hindering intimacy with you. LORD, you are the oxygen we need. When fastened unto you, the enemy will see a sign that says, “ACCESS DENIED.” Glory to you, Heavenly Father. Glory to you LORD JESUS. Glory to you HOLY SPIRIT. All honor and GLORY belongs to you.

In Jesus Holy Name and BLOOD,

Amen

http://www.openbible.info/topics/mourning