Monthly Archives: January 2019

This began today at 333. That definitely means MUCH to ME. As I listen to the song. “I know how to LOVE you well” (Tim McGraw) I keep thinking about, something that was said. “GOD is doing SOMETHING EXTRAORDINARY, in your marriage.” I REALLY had to have JESUS break that down for ME. Because, what I can tell YOU most, is, that our marriage is beautifully BROKEN…and HE is making it WHOLE. In so many ways, it is at the VERY best place, it has EVER been. AND THAT, is Because, of the LOVE, of JESUS. It just is ya’ll. He gives us GRACE, STRENGTH, ABility, to overcome and ALWAYS surrender , in the process. MOST of ALL, He helps US forgive…and to have HEARTS, that are being cleaned, so WE can LOVE more. WE have a LOT of tangible blessings. WE have had plenty, and little. and NOW we know, that … it’s important, to just BE GRATEFUL, for EVERYTHING. The GOOD, the bad, the Ugly. Be Grateful. Choose that. It is where the JOY….lives. In the HOUSE of Gratefulness.

When I was asking HIM, about this entry, HE said, simply. “MANY are going through LOTS of trials right now. And when in trials and suffering, it’s often, hard to SEE the LIGHT, at the end of the tunnel. But, I AM that light. And I will make the darkness FLEE. If ONLY my children would TRUST Me. Tears. I Hug HIM, and I say, “I’m so sorry.”  I can feel His heart breaking, for the things happening, in THIS world. Yet, He is not surprised either. As in this world, the song…”THERE GOES MY LIFE” (Kenny Chesney) plays. He says, “Me too. But, it will be okay. There is ALWAYS a plan. and it does NOT fail. He smiles, through His tears.

I am often comforted, when I SEE HIM, share in the emotion. That might sound strange. But, in THIS world, it is SOoooooo EASY to Feel alone, and just isolated. For ME, that can happen, in a room full of people. But God. When I see JESUS, this way, it helps me remember, that…He is like US, in a lot of ways. LOVE. Breaking down, is NOT always easy, or BREEZY. Again, but GOD. However, it is necessary, and there ALWAYS is beauty, that comes, through, from and IN the process. #HISLOVEHEALSUS

I remember, a TIME is my LIFE. Oh man…I was SOooooo not as close to JESUS. I still LOVED HIM, yes. But, I was REALLY HELL bent, on MY OWN ways. It was rough. And, I experienced a LOT of Hell.  THIS was one of my favorite songs. “Breakdown HERE”

“Paved with pretty lies and broken dreams…. ” Those are just SOME of the lyrics…. “SURE hate to breakdown here, nothing up ahead, or in the rearview MIRROR. Out in the middle of nowhere nowhere. I’m in trouble, if these wheels stop rolling. God help me keep me Movin’ somehow…” I would BELT this song out…over and over. I think, I even bought the single. It might have been a ONE hit wonder. But, now, I look at the lyrics, from a different perspective.

What is in YOUR rearview mirror?

Is it a Beautiful, place of breakdown? Because, at TIMES, mine was LOVELY scenery….on the outside. This pertains to cities, I lived in….My physical body, and actual vehicles. Yet, inside, there was chaos, that ONLY …HIS LOVE could help. And much of the time, I just wandered around, hoping I was doing some good in the world. Yet, I was tormented, just by existence. Again…but GOD.

LIVING in that horribly fearful place, created opportunity, for VERY poor decisions. Thank GOD for Grace. I continue to ask Forgiveness, for anyone, i directly, or indirectly harmed, in that time of life. Even with words…I so apologize. For then…and NOW. My heart…is so to LOVE. I come by it, Heaven made, straight from ABOVE. Lord knows, I am not a perfect child/or adult. I’m so thankful, that GOD sees fit, to LOVE me ANYWAYS. He LOVES me back to LIFE, EVERY single DAY. And for that, I will forever, have more than gratitude. #onegratefullionkid . LOVE.

Today is the 31st, and 31 is offspring, in the LIFE book. In the bible, it says, WE are HIS children. SO….WE are protected, and SAFE and WE are LOVED. And THAT, is a beautiful place, to breakdown. Don’t you think?

In His Grace,

E

These Words Echo inside Me. As I AM suddendly (spelled wrong for a reason, in THIS season) It is 5:52 HERE, and “MY OLD FRIEND” (Tim McGRAW plays. To give you an idea. The lyrics… My old friend. Good Bye… Good Bye… Yes. All, about letting go, not holding on. Because, AS Much AS WE want to, in the NATURAL, WE can’t HOLD onto HURT, FOREVER. As the SONG, “BRING ON THE RAIN” Comes ON. And what YOU have to UNDERSTAND, IS I have NOT been, TRYING to. And, I have been releasing, a little every single day. But, THIS, IS NOT Just, About ONE THING. Contrary, to popular belief. And, as God often reminds ME, WE do things, to help others too. It is part of LOVE.

Today with JESUS, I hear, “TIME to wake up”  Thank GOD too. I was not having a happy dream. But God. He is a rescuer. Always. When He woke me up, it wasn’t LONG after, that He had me, typing. I heard HIM say, “WE are going camping. ” I shuddered. He knew why. There is a film, that I watched, that had to do with, a campground, and the child was taken away. And she was killed. I looked at Him, and said, “Please no. He said, “It is time, to deal with the childhood stuff. We ARE going to DO THIS TOGETHER. I won’t let ANY HARM come TO YOU. I promise. DO YOU TRUST ME?” And I said, It isn’t going to feel good? He said, I’m not going to lie, it won’t always feel, like a bowl full of cherries at first. But as you listen to me, and release the old stuff, you will  SEE more FREEDOM. THEN, it will FEEL so MUCH better. ” LOVE.

I Thought back to the book, I had begun to read, the other day. And i looked up at HIM, almost ashamed. He smiled, and said, knowing my EVERY single thought; ” YOU are NOT ” MUCH AFRAID” You WERE once but THOSE days are LONG gone. You received MY SEED of LOVE long AGO. And I know, YOU DO TRUST ME. I AM Asking, Can you trust ME, AGAIN?  ” As HERE the song “EVERY LIGHT IN THE HOUSE IS ON” comes ON (Trace Atkins) I LOVE that Song. I often hear it, when I am praying for children, whom I LOVE, that I can not talk to. BUT, I TRUST HIM to LOVE and care for. NOW, because of NEW circumstances, that HE knows about, it has more meaning.

We walked around the camp ground, and it looked deserted. Like a wasteland. I said, THIS place looks dead. It is so dark. What is it? He says, It was an Amusement Park, that got turned into a campground. That explains the trash on the ground, I see, I said. Then, I had this thought, that popped, into my head, from childhood, of myself as trash. Jesus said, “You are not trash. You are beautiful. I began to cry. Here. The song. “One of these days” Lyrics…”One of these days…I’m gonna LOVE ME.” Tears. BUT I do LOVE HIM. Always. People always say, if you don’t LOVE yourself, you can’t love someone else right? Well, I LOVE myself. But, I often fight with the child in me. Because, THAT is who gets hurt most. AND who connects with JESUS most.

SO DO I trust, YES.

Proverbs 3: 5-6 TRUST in the LORD with ALL your HEART, and LEAN not ON your OWN UNDERSTANDING. in ALL YOUR

WAYS ACKNOWLEDGE HIM, AND HE WILL MAKE YOUR PATHS STRAIGHT….

THIS VERSE HAS NEW MEANING TODAY…..

This morning I was awakened by my Jesus. That is NOT unusual. For many years, that has been such a gift. Though recognizing His present, in the presence of HIS LOVE, is NEW each morning. Especially in the mourning, which HE is turning to DANCINg as promised. This morning, as I woke, the song, “CINDERELLA” (SCC) was on the radio. There is so much significance to that. And it was 3:28. Part of ME wanted to go back to sleep, but I know, when it is TIME to write. There is an unction, from GOD, when HE wants to speak. And TODAY is a BIIIIIG day. LOVE will show itself. As the song on, is, “Love’s Been Following You” (Twila Paris).

The #1 thing, I have really battled with, is fearing I will mess something up. Or, that someone else will. Do you struggle with this too? I definitely do not believe my heart is to rebel against God. And I desire to simply LOVE others, and share HIS LOVE. Really, that IS my Ultimate goal. It amazes me, how many come to attempt harm, and yet God says, Love them. Because, the truth is, they are NOT coming against YOU. And THAT is truth. IT is ALL about where, EVERYONE is with GOD. That seems, so simple, yet so profound. For example, if someone is angry at God, they will likely, take that out ON you. And YOU cannot take that personally, or to heart. Because, it is really not about you.

So , to the title of this entry….

This morning, picked up where I was yesterday with Jesus.

I was catching lightning bugs with Jesus. I used to love to do that, as a child. We were at my childhood home. But, it looked so different. It looked joyful. He was reminding me, of the “GOOD” memories. He reminded me, of playing softball, with my mom and dad. He said, ” Beautiful ONE, there were NO wrong turns. I know YOU feel like you messed up. But you did NOT. I am so VERY proud of YOU. I want YOU to ALWAYS stay FOCUSED on the GOOD. Remember to pray for those who have ill intent, LOVE always. This is key. You deeply know, and that is not EASY.”  Tears fall. He catches them, and puts them in a bottle.

I hear the song, the lyrics… “in need of resurrection….take the pieces, make me whole again. ”  (Resurrection – Nicole Sponberg)

Father forgive us, for fearing the motives of others, I say. My heart is not to judge, from pain. Jesus smiles. He says, “Darling, You are ALWAYS learning, and GROWING. Remember, there is Grace to heal. Always, as You are healing with me. My promises are true. Yes, and Amen. Walk with Me, Talk with Me. I am Here. YOU are NEVER alone. Thank you for your willingness to surrender, and forgive. Choose to forgive you too. Love.”

I look up, and I see my sweet husband, has joined today. I smile. “Thank you, I say. That matters, so much. This is a NEW day, and NEW FREEDOM will come today, won’t it sire?” He smiles. I hear HIM laughing with JOY.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Today READ this, through HIS eyes, and lay down, ALL. Know, that to JESUS, who knows EVERYTHING, you MATTER MOST. He wants YOUR HEART, in FULL. You are so VERY Loved.

In His Grace,

E

Today, is the beginning, of something new.  A wonderland of sorts.  But, it doesn’t always “feel ” wonderful to me.  I often feel like Alice in the story.  But God.  I will be just walking along, and then Heaven appears .  This happened today.

Not everyone takes in the sites, the same.  Let alone the sight view, we all have.  And me, well I’m “different .” And, people either love that, or don’t. Thankfully, those God surrounds me ,most often with do.

So to the title, of the entry 🚪.  Was walking on the beach, with Jesus, and more.  It had been raining for days.  We went for breakfast first.  And, Jesus had us, mention her story.  Particular, the “green ticket” part.  If you don’t know this part, it’s from when she was, maybe 3. It was around Easter, and she wanted, it for Sunday School. I was puzzled at first, what she meant.  Then I saw a dollar flash, b4 my eyes. I looked in my purse, and pulled one out.  I said, “This? ” She said, “Yes. ” ❤️

I remember being so humbled by her. Still am.  I prayed that she always stay, that humble.  And, that we as well.  ❤️  God has kept that, in tact.  Humility doesn’t always feel fun.  But, that’s not, it’s purpose.  That is simple.  Humility ,draws  you closer to Jesus.  You can’t go through a humbling season, and not need God.

After we finished our meal.  The Sun came out.  Were told, It hadn’t been out, in days.  And it was exciting to see people ,come enjoy the sunshine.  Little did they know, it was sonshine too.  ❤️

The Sparkles in Sand happen, when the Sun shines on them.  ❤️  To Jesus ,WE are the sparkles 💖 in the sand.  As are the gold 🌟 nuggets of wisdom, hidden in each story, He writes and shares .❤️

Was walking on the beach, beside my Love ❤️.  And I hear,  “You see those beautiful little angels 👼 ?”  Jesus shows me a little boy, and girl.  In so many ways, it was healing.  They stayed on the beach, and played.  The whole time, He said, “Remembrance of the good.  That’s what makes you sparkle and shine. ”  I watched them play some .  And He said, “Like you and he.  Always and forever my kids, my family.  My sparkles. ”

I see Him smile 😊, and I say,  “He did it.  I just want to be apart of it.  ” He looks up,  and says, “Beautiful one, YOU are NEVER left out. You are ALWAYS, a part of my world. I’m so proud of you. You’ll see.  Joy, in ALL things.  1,2,3 jump.  Love ❤️

#jumpingintonewbyHisGrace

There was a big puddle.  He held my hand, and jumped in.  #splashheardallaround ❤️

#laughterandjoybeautifulsounds ❤️

Healing…. Freedom… And Refreshing.

A beautiful way 🚦 to end, and begin.

#Lifteduponangels ❤️

In His Grace,

E