In His Steps and Hers

11702785_10200801803564457_8496415044547532650_n

12004852_925494327532118_784396942730903230_n19693_491506860886978_1220456359_nhappily-ever-after-wood-print1393995_10201078220131542_2001900371_nIt has been A LONG time since writing, was on the “AGENDA.” Part of me wants to start this post, with “I’M BACK.” Trust me, It is NOT like, I went on a vacation. But, I was definitely put on a PAUSE. You see, when your JOB, is to just BE and DO whatever Heaven commands of YOU. It’s quite simple. You either Do it, or You Don’t. As a child, WE are supposed to learn this lesson. And I am very grateful, because I was given excellent earthly parents. They did everything, humanly possible, to TEACH me. They, particularly my biological mom, Sarah Cooper, was committed to taking me, and my siblings to church. I never know, where Jesus is going to take things, in my life or words. I just kind of buckle in, and say, “Let’s go!”

My Mother, and I had a very interesting relationship. In a LOT of ways it was a Love/hate relationship. But looking back, I can safely say, Jesus is what rooted it in LOVE. She was the first person who introduced me, to Jesus. I will always be eternally grateful to her, for that. But, because my mother, had a LOT and I mean a LOT of undealt with pain, and I was a mirror, of that pain, I was not always an easy part of her life. I would watch her, and marvel at her. She was literally a teacher. I’m certain, in the Heaven’s Jesus still uses her, in that capacity. I believe, she and I were more alike, than I knew, but she was scared to speak of it. In that time, it wasn’t something that was done. Even today, so many who knew her, tell me, how proud, she is, or would be of me. How much I remind me of her. I used to be hurt, because I harbored my own pain. I dealt with so much trauma, and even abuse. But, Jesus is a HEALER, and the Holy Spirit a nurturer. Not to mention, our Heavenly Father, is a strong protector, and this beautiful union, just this amazing FAMILY, the greatest GIFT, to be a part of. AND, my greatest desire, is for the family I was birthed from, to be united with the one, I was birthed into. In my heart, I know, ONE DAY, it will BE. Because JESUS doesn’t LIE. He promised ME.

My Mom and Dad, though they had their own pain, and challenges, taught me, and I pray us, deep down to take things one day at a time. Jesus lead our home. ALL be it, it was often silently, and it took years to see what Jesus was doing behind the scenes. If you asked others, in our family if this was true, I’m not certain they’d agree. And that’s okay with me. Because, it’s where THEY are. And, here’s the thing…. Someday, EVERYONE will see. The LIFE BOOK is Heaven’s word. It’s known, as the word of God. And, when it is in YOU, you LIVE in a different way. You have more FREEDOM. You MOVE different. YOU speak DIFFERENT. YOU BREATHE DIFFERENT. YOU MAY SMELL DIFFERENTLY, TYPE DIFFERENTLY< see? 🙂

 

THE POINT is….. HEAVEN has a plan, and surrender of our plan is critical TO that plan being SCENE…..

I walk in the steps, of Sarah…my littlest Angel. Oh they are tiny shoes, and big shoes. Tiny wings, and MIGHTY wings. I also, walk in the steps of my mother Sarah as well. Now, my Father, and so many more. I am so grateful, for the heavenly cloud of witnesses. I will NEVER forget the day on October 18, 2015. It was nighttime. I know it was late. I rememeber that we had been up all night. and i think, it was around 3:33 AM. My heart literally stopped from the pain. BUT GOD……

I went HOME. Yes, I SAW the witnesses. I was so VERY enveloped by the LOVE of HEAVEN. When I get to the darkest places, I now, have that memory, and JESUS does not allow, it to torment me. It ALWAYS comforts ME. IT ALWAYS brings HEALING. It is truly BEAUTIFUL!!! The very first thing that happened, is Sarah comes running up to ME…. She said, “Mom, what are YOU doing HERE?” Then, in the same breath, “Nevermind, that doesn’t matter come on!” She grabbed me, and took me through!!!! It was BREATHTAKING! I was in wonder, as everywhere I looked, was more pristine, and phenominal, and I just had no words, because, I was HOME. I was SAFE. I was FREE. I was where I ALWAYS DREAMED to BE, WANTED to BE. Where I COULD BE ME. WHERE I FIT!!! OH IT WAS JUST PERFECT!!!!!! I went into a room that was like a GRAND BALL ROOM. AND EVERYONE JUST SHOWERED ME WITH LOVE! SOMETHING THAT HAS ABSOLUTEY NEVER, EVER HAPPENED HERE ON EARTH. NOT ONCE,in full, that I recall..

The closest I EVER came, was when I was 16, some friends, threw a surprise party for me, and I got some hugs, and presents. And i remember thinking, if my life were done tonight, that’d be okay. And that seemed like a strange thought to have. But remember, as I share b4, I used to, as a teen have other issues with bad stuff, like self harm. But Jesus healed me. Thank Heaven’s The testimony of His love. It has now been 16 year, since any of that bad. Jesus is so GOOD!!!! I believe that IS Gone for good, and HE is used me, to help so many others, with that, thank God.

But back to Heaven…..  Jesus is Electric. He was struck by lightening on the cross. And he held a sphere with electricity in it, representing my life. After what felt like time, thought time exist not there, He came over to me, and said something. He said, “Well, I need your answer.” I said, “what is the question?’ “Do you want to stay?” I thought about it for a moment. Then I said, “This is so hard. Because, this is MY HOME. I have ALWAYS wanted to BE HERE. You KNOW THAT. But BEFORE you sent me THERE, I MADE a promise to YOU. I told YOU, that I would ALWAYS stay there for as LONG as YOU NEEDED me to, NO MATTER what. AND well, I just don’t think and feel that the work is finished there. He smiled, and He looked at me and said, ” My beautiful, my friend, My daughter, My precious, My Love, My everything Oh, how I want to thank you. For most don’t even think about it. They don’t count the cost. Now, to be fair, since that moment, I have had MANY moment, where I have said, “Um, if you’d given me a glimpse I would have said no.” But the truth is, I never would have said NO to Jesus. And, even my thinking I would, is kind of like a running joke. He is the Lion of Judah. My Lion KING. That movie took on NEW meaning for me. BOY, did it ever. There is more to what happened to me that day, but I don’t feel led to share ALL of it.  And, I will end with this, The SONG BUTTERFLY is coming on. OH I LOVE MY JESUS!!!! # HEAVENSCaLLINGCARDS

Comments (2)

  1. Sue Ann Jackson

    My sweet girl, I feel for you for I am so glad you are here but I long to be there too. One day we will be there forever. For now just know your heavenly heart has helped me travel this grief filled road. God has blessed me to walk this side with you for awhile…..Eternally together in HIM! Mama Sue

    Reply
  2. CeCe

    Only Jesus knows the cost of the oil in your alabaster box my precious one! What a glorious testimony! What a precious glimpse of Heaven for us all! Thank you for your willingness and transparency but also for your courage to share with all of us! I love you! Welcome Back … or should I say is it nice to be off ‘pause?’

    Reply

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